(First World) Man of (Shallow) Sorrows

Posted: May 12, 2014 in Uncategorized

(Niners Inside Blog) – The greatest obstacle for Michael Sam may be over. Sam did get drafted by the St. Louis Rams near the end of the seventh round of the NFL draft. Sam was up against the older generation, which is far more resistant to homosexual acceptance than the current generation.

General managers, scouts and coaches grew up in a sports culture where the definition of being a man is partially formed by how much an athlete can distance themselves from homosexuality and femininity. It was part of the male code – be a strong athlete, prove you’re physically tough, date as many women as possible, and constantly prove you are NOT gay.

In the older generation, coaches often used homosexual and misogynistic slurs to motivate players.

The drafting of Sam means that the sports world in general and the NFL specifically, is escaping the old masculine gender formation along with the rest of society.


Being supportive of a gay player also does not raise homosexual suspicion. As a result, sports fans in conservative states seem to be open to a gay player. In a recent poll, 71% of Cowboy fans said they would be comfortable if the team drafted Sam.

In the end, Sam’s courage was rewarded. Not only did Sam declare he is gay, he is also African American, which opens himself to duel discrimination.

“He is already coming from behind,” said Dr. John Culhane. “It makes him even more courageous.” Culhane is professor of law and director of the Health Law Institute at Widener University School of Law and co-author of Same-Sex Legal Kit for Dummies.

Michael Sam hugged his boyfriend when the call finally came. Cameras were there to capture the moment.

They wept in each other’s arms and kissed.

President Obama weighed in on the occasion via an official White House statement:

“The President congratulates Michael Sam, the Rams and the NFL for taking an important step forward in our Nation’s journey. From the playing field to the corporate boardroom, LGBT Americans prove everyday that you should be judged by what you do and not who you are.”

I’m not understanding the courage thing here.

It doesn’t take courage to be gay.

Not these days anyway.

You’re either gay, or you’re not.

Or you’re gay on alternate calendar weeks, and not on the rest.

In fact, being gay has never been more accepted in American culture than it is today.

It’s actually marketable.

Obama, in his usual historical myopia, and his need to make his time in office the most pivotal time in the history of the United States, and the World, and the Universe, and everything beyond it the most important time for all humanity, fails to recognize that this road has been traveled before, and that Sam is simply walking on a highway paved by the likes of Billie Jean King and Martina Navratilova.

Maybe he would have thought of them if they had been … well, a different shade of gay.

Michael Sam eventually overcame the emotion and was able to comment on his selection by the Rams:

“From last season alone, I should’ve been in the first three rounds — SEC Defensive player of the year, All-American,” Sam said, listing off his 2013 accomplishments, via the Rams official website. “I should have gone in the top three rounds easily.”

Apparently, Sam believes that he was being discriminated against as a result of his sexuality.

Someone should have advised Texas’ consensus All-American and 2013 Ted Hendricks Award winner Jackson Jeffcoat to come out of the closet, at least just for the draft.

Jeffcoat went undrafted while black. Apparently not as egregious an offense as going in the seventh round while black AND gay, because Obama didn’t send him a personal note condemning the NFL’s obvious slight.

Discrimination, in the eyes of the unanimous All-American (2013), SEC Co-Defensive Player of the Year (2013) and First Team All-SEC (2013) is not being picked when he wanted to be picked. Not getting what he’s (in his mind) entitled to.

I’m thinking that NFL teams will put on open displays of discrimination when quarterbacks  refuse to allow themselves to be tackled by Sam during a zone blitz, or when an alert fullback lays him out on his ass.

Michael Sam will make (at the very least) $4+ million dollars for the first four years of his NFL career, and millions more beyond that as he matures in the game.

There are countless millions of people in the world today living on less than $1.25 a day.

In fact. roughly 30 people died of starvation in the world during the period of time that it took Sam and his man to hug and kiss in celebration.


The First World problems of First World residents such as Michael Sam somehow seem trite in comparison.

And that’s the last wire for Sunday, May 11th 2014.

What was news before this moment, is now history.

Good night.

  1. boilingfrogs says:

    Reblogged this on The Universal Spectator.

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